How to Fail at Everything You Do

How to Fail at Everything You Do How to Fail at Everything You Do 1. Do you already have an end goal in mind for that new project that you want to fail? Scrap it, forget it. A great way to fail is to have no idea of where you are headed when you start. Dont see the puzzle as a larger image waiting to be constructed, but as a collection of isolated pieces that have no relation with each other. The more you visualize your goal, the lesser you chances at succeeding in failing and the only goal here is to fail.2. Never do your homework. Why study the behavior of an investment before sinking funds into it? Why tempt success in such a way? Failing is about being as little informed as possible about your endeavors. No research. No reading. No preparation. Ever.3. Failing well also involves ignoring your costs, be it money, time or effort, from the get go. Failures have no need for initial assessments and should jump head first into everything they do. Youll find out what you did wrong lat er once you are neck deep in failure. Remember no looking before leaping.4. Dont worry about getting a head start on your tasks, always wait to start until the last minute. It is much easier to fail when you procrastinate until the deadline before starting to work. Better yet procrastinate, but be sure to let the task hang over your head, stress you out, and make you entirely unproductive for weeks.5. Who needs organization skills? bedrngnis a failure, thats for sure. Organization is a habit for successful people. Make your life as cluttered and disorganized as possible. Keep everything in the most secure depository on the planet, your brain. Or, better yet, write everything down on 1,000 Post-It notes and keep them tucked away in forgotten jacket pockets, lint traps, and junk mail piles. Just make sure you never have a clue what needs to be done and when it needs to be completed.6. Keep to yourself. You can fail at everything all by yourself. Never ask for help for anything. Why s hould you? You already know everything better than anyone else. The more you have to accomplish the better you can fail at all of them.7. You know what they say go with your first guess. That means the first idea that comes to mind is the best, right? Just let your mind run where it may and whatever happens to come out is good enough. Brainstorming is for suckers.8. Lets talk about constructive criticism. Thats the kind of thing people need only when they cant do something right, by themselves, the first time. Dismiss assessments, ignore feedback, and never listen to customer complaints. They just dont understand that you know what they want better than they ever could.9. Finally, if at first you dont succeed, quit. After all, you cant succeed if you dont try. Something is only worth doing if it works the first time through. The more you try something, the more likely you will eventually succeed, so never try anything a second time youre just tempting fate.